So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
someone just puked in the library. they put up caution tape. i totally underestimated finals week.
she called me a fuckfaceshitdick. not that's creative. it sounds like a crayola crayon, preferrably an orange-brown shade.
i need to start using my dry humping skills. i was dry humping champion in 7th grade
He fucked me so hard I might have to go to the hospital for internal bleeding
Can I have him when you're done?
i also took my stockings off in the bathroom and blew my nose with them in the cab ride home. james was appalled
I got laxative. And a toothbrush. Because who wants to buy just laxative on a Friday night?
How does one un superglue their foot to the floor
I am descending into that finals week rage fueled by ramen, mountain dew and bad sex is what's up.
Masturbating to the DNC live stream. Not my proudest moment
you know its getting late when the "nevers" are turning into "maybe"
Dude, he turned on “London Bridge” by Fergie and GAVE ME A LAP DANCE.
I don't know if I'm dying or this is just a mild inconvenience
Randomize
