pray for me tomorrow cause I have a midterm that I've mostly studied for by watching Bill Nye episodes on the subject...
i just used burnetts to get spraypaint off the floor of my dorm lobby
You made eat vitamins until I threw up
We are having a competition to see who can masterbate in the wierdest place, right now hes winning since he masterbated on his Jr. High school bus.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Taking a semester off always leads to bad things like having a baby or getting married
I just woke up in my locked bathroom. It's 5 PM. What happened?
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
We grabbed as many adult diapers as we could and made a run for it.
He's only giving you free adderall so you can focus on his dick.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like I might be the only person I know who eats bundles of radishes in-between orgasms from their vibrator.
So you can text and rub it at the same time? Bravo.
I can do anything and masturbate, if I truly wanted to.
Like every two minutes he would pull out and whipser "don't you do it, you bastard" while looking at his penis. His new name in my phone is 'penis whisperer'
YOU CANT JUST BLOW GUYS BC THEY’RE NICE TO YOU LEXI
I CAN IF I WANT TO
Until you've snorted cocaine at 6am before your nursing school clinicals birthing babies you're not on my level
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
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