Thanks for stranding me with th douchebag award recipients
just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
never trust anyone who drives a pt cruiser.... write that down
He looked at me like he has never had a girl throw up on him before.
if im not pregnant im gonna be so pissed for spending the money from my weed fund on the test
wow, a mother in the making
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
She was telling me which girls she thought I should fuck or not at the bar. Why can't all one night stands be that cool after?
Guys with integrity exist just to rain on my slut parade.
Saturday evening, however, will be my vodka and bubble wrap extravaganza.
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
Wow has his pick up routine ever gotten bad. He is trying to use cheese as a way to flirt with the waitress
Oh man, he played the Harvarti cheese card and it didn't work. Now he is flailing
Sometimes I think about the fact that I lost my virginity while watching anime and I wonder what that says about me
If Denver makes it to the Super Bowl I'll quit drinking. So I'm pretty much stocking up on booze
Details are irrelevant. Come bail me out of jail.
How does the curb feel today?
It's stronger than my elbow. But I found my lighter while I was down there.
Randomize
