It's fine actually... I'm pretty sure he had the crookedest weiner in the world anyway.
Like he had it hanging in the wind and you just decided, "nope, I don't think that one's for me." ????
God no! I could just feel it. His clock said it was 8:00 when, clearly, it should have been midnight.
after a few more beers I realized that both my wife and I like Latin men.
I just busted my ass on the ice in front of my entire AA meeting. As if being there wasn't embarrassing enough.
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
My prof gave me extra credit for drawing a ninja on my paper and writing "ninja will up my grade"
I have a physical this friday. On a scale from 1-10, 10 being the most judgemental gay bashing, how much judgement am I gonna get from my dr when he checks my balls and sees the cherry tattoo
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
I'm using my breathalyzer result sheet as a coaster for my 40.
She had a tattoo on her pelvis that said "it's cock-o-clock" an had clocks and hot dogs exploding away from it. I'd like to tell you it was deal breaker buuuuuuut.......
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
He let me finish eating my sandwich while I sat his face. I think I'm in love with this little eager beaver.
Dude if I call tonight please answer and just say "NO, dont do it."
BAT SHIT CRAZY
It's you're fault, even though I never called
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
There is a guy down by the river wearing a zebra print speedo and a sombrero, with a beer in each hand, screaming "This is America bitches!"
Randomize
