He had one of those small greek statue penises
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
I'm handcuffed to your bathroom sink. Save me.
It's a system.. i get to hook up with them and you get to play words with friends with them afterwards.
I'm an EMT, not a miracle worker. No, I can't fix your sprained dick.
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
No seriously stop! I feel bad for him. It isn't even big enough to make fun of. It's so small that it's like a disability.
Is buying her a loofah for my house commitment like? I don't wanna give the wrong idea
Hold on I'm doing something revolutionary that blossomed from a high idea
Well I just walked into a wedding reception and im currently eating a cannoli in the men's room while pissing
Would I chase a raccoon with a flaming stick sober?
So far in the last ten minutes I have tried to pour cereal into a plate. Today's gonna be a great day.
There no better feeling of self control than stopping yourself before telling your girlfriend she gives head just like her sister.
Watching Faye Reagan porn all weekend for St Patty's day. Nothing has ever seemed more appropriate.
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
Randomize
