Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
i was high and broke so i stole a roast chicken and a 40 inch sheet cake from wegmans and ate in a bathroom stall.
dude i feel like shit
well u did eat a lot of play-doh
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
"Take a picture of me motorboating molly" was probably not my best career move
The moment that kid turns 18, I will have his sperm for all three meals.
Oh God. You're going to jail
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
I'm just walking around Lowe's groping the carpets....
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
We have GOT to stop getting stoned and going out for expensive dinners.
I'm pretty sure the cop knew you were drunk when you tried to light your cigg with a chapstick.
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
Did you just correct my spelling of a made up word?
No, I just was using your word in plural form
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
When the bouncer doesn't let you in... Don't ask him where he works so you could file a complaint with the better business bureau... It only proves him right.
It's 5 PM...and you're 35. Congrats on being an amazing human being.
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