I thought she was going to get passionate and throw her on the bed and fuck her, but she just started breaking stuff.
That's the thing about women.
Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
i just saw a man dusting the fake palm trees at the mall
...welcome to nebraska
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
I left a care package of Jack Daniel's, pancake mix and porn in your apartment. Merry fucking Christmas.
I can't believe he let me cut his hair as stoned as I was.. I think I even cut my own hair too
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
Bro if you were a bird I would puke in your mouth right now
You are not going to get a pat on the back from me for not fucking that 40 year old again.
He's in the same dorm as me. We are sharing a laundry room, gym, and cafeteria. I'VE ALREADY COMMITTED DORMCEST AND MOVE-IN DAY ISN'T UNTILL NEXT WEEK!!!!
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
And I must've sleep walked to the fridge cause when I woke up, there I was, balls deep in a fudge pop.
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
we will now reference it as "the infamous double dick night"
Hey now one little girl thought it was cool I was covered in blood. Apparently according to her Mom she wants to be a surgeon when she grows up
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