Dude, hurry and get over. I need a wingman. She is on her 6th vodka shot and her resident ugly friend is still sober
Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
You just kept saying over and over "Tell me I won't do it." Someone finally told you you won't. You did. Welcome to herpes.
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
Church boner. Awkwardddd
What am I legally allowed to do to a girl that is the equivalent of me punching her in the face?
He asked me if we could throw a lingerie party together so I guess he's single again
I know. I need to get a vagina tranquilizer.
In complete seriousness I think I am the highest person on earth
I think people like me is why alcohol became illegal at one point
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
HIS NAME IN MY PHONE IS JOSHUA DREAMCHASER I CAN NOT
NO SHAME NOVEMBER
Fuck you, I'm yelling at a mountain right now
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
whenever dudes said you had nice tits you'd scream at them "This double push-up bra is full of deceit and lies!"
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