Just figured out how to smoke weed with a toaster.
I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
SURVIVAL MODE. WE CAN DO THIS. Celebratory survived-working-christmas-retail sex to follow
Besides the fact that the only male who has shown an interest in me in the last 5 months has a strange and unfortunate resemblance to fucking Frodo, I've been good thanks
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Isn't it my whole life blown into this perfect spoon shaped piece of melted and artificially colored sand?
Wow.
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
I was walking out the front door and heard his roomate say "It looks like you need a chiropractor." I think my work here is done.
I have found random beers stashed in my purse and microwave... Apparently I thought 2015 was gonna have a beer shortage
My mute roommate is using sign language to ask a guy to fuck her.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Excuse me while I gouge out my eyes.
In which case my work here is done.
orgy was averted by karaoke, thank god
His pet bird was perched ON HIS DICK.
Dude you were so wasted you thought a fake electric candle was real and tried to light your cig with it. Multiple times.
I could see the visible disappointment when she saw my penis
now whenever i pass that house all i can think about is how i pooped in their yard..
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