Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
i found her turbo button.....if you know what i mean.
so i woke up on my toliet naked backwards. good night.
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
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He couldn't say anything coherently but shot off a perfectly timed "that's what she said" when michelle said he'd have to ride in the trunk because she didn't have enough room up front.
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
I think they're German
Just say lederhosen and see what happens
I came in and she was laying on the ground just stoking it saying "the floor is where our feet step"
I wound up gambling on giant connect four with the bartender. I think he saw my boobs.
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my throat is bruised, my back is scarred, my vagina feels like it's going to fall off.. you're like godzilla. you destroy everything.
I just shit my bed. Go ahead and make your 40 year old incontinence jokes now.
I can only get day drunk because of my medicine now, so... There's that
When I finally came to, I was in the DJ booth wearing his headphones while he was spinning. That's all I got.
He asked if we were going to take advantage of his drunken state. When we said no he tired to show us what we were missing out on. It was so sad it almost made him cute.
90% sure I just opened a snapchat of you in a fuzzy bathrobe next to your ceiling collapsing
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