Would it be weird if I brought slabs of bacon with me to the beach?
my roommate and her friend got reaallllly high last night and it looks like they played scrabble. one of their words is "nippal"
I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
For some reason I have a hard time believing getting drunk and recreating a movie about singing transvestites is ever very far from a situation you're in.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tried to eat a chip. Mouth wouldn't cooperate. Nearly died. Wow I've missed this.
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
I made him a flow chart of what to do if I got arrested.
But think about it. I could put her gold medal around my penis
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants
Well I didn't spend $7 on an Uber just to get limp dick
I feel fine lol. I tried climbing a tree but the branch broke and I got arrested.
If dispatch calls for us tell them I'm having a significant emotional event in the restroom
Dick is healthier for you than green beans
we need to open a bar. a bar with... wait for it... A FUCKING BALL PIT.
LOL. Do you guys need a ride home?
No. we're home already. i just thought it was a brilliant fucking idea.
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