South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
meow
WTF. STOP SENDING ME ANIMAL NOISES. ITS FUCKING WEIRD.
he fingered my asshole thinking it was my vag...I couldn't bring myself to tell him, mostly from shame for me and pity for him
soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
Sitting in the library lobby in the middle of exam week. Drunk. Dressed as santas slutty helper. Waiting for the student shuttle service. People are clapping for me as they walk by. Tell me how this isnt college
I drank mimosas and played bocce ball in the middle of finals week...now i know how Comm majors feel all the time.
i've never smoked before...when you said wake and bake i thought you meant like a funeral bbq or something
at what point did putting a bag of doritos in the freezer seem like a really good idea?
I blacked in at 6:30am on the last stop on the train with a random fedora on? And I'm pretty sure I rode in a limo last night while eating pizza
i swear to god if you did anything to my honey bunches ill remove all the oats and shove them up your dickhole then play pinata with my foot to knock them all back out
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
Watching the series finale of Friends and crying in my Thai food. I don't like hangover Jared.
WE ARE DOING DRUGS AND GOING TO THE STRIP CLUB SATURDAY LADIES
You set a couch on fire in my brothers backyard?
Just the cushions
She's got a shotglass necklace, running down the street asking people to "fill her up". Get here.
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