? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
can you have the cops turn on the gps locator on my phone...i just woke up in a Hooters uniform and I have no idea where I am...
i'm not a human right now. not even a dancer.
youve choked your chicken with your arm asleep and acted like it was some1 else right?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, I totally just put a lit lighter to my hand for 10 seconds
How much beer did you get for it?
One ice cold coors, but those mountains lied
this is hardly the first time i've been told i'm dressed "too suggestively" for 7 in the morning.
I now have an ENTIRE drawer of unused disposable silverware from Boston Market... and you guys said I needed to "buy" kitchen stuff
Of course my walk of shame coincided with the alumni marathon on campus. But, I did get a thumbs up from the woman handing out water.
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At the gym and this really hot trainer checked me out and was talking to his buddy about his workout. He then says "yeah man, like I'm doing so many reps- what's 7 times 7, 45?"
He was THIS close.
Yes but from my experience being high around your own baby makes you feel like the worst kind of mom
His parents know me as "the white shoed screamer"
In any case. I fucked a married couple recently. Know what a straight person would've done there? Been super weirded out by 1/3 of the genitals there, that's what.
This chick just walked out of the men's room with molly all over her nose and her shirt half unbuttoned. She nodded to all of us and said "gentlemen" as she exited
There's a guy in a plaid shirt running around asking everyone if they want to head butt him
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