he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
I went from a chick that didn't like to have sex to one that can't get enough of it. I can't believe I'm going to say this but at 27 I think I need a happy medium
I woke up to her vacumming the grass
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
She was a little hefty, so I turned on the strobe light in our room. Everything looks better with a strobe light.
You disappeared for 10 minutes. Then came back with nothing but your boxers and a life jacket on to tell us we were all screwed when the flood came and you would be the only survivor.
The EMT told me when I left the ER "I'd like to take off your pants again and inspect your package. Just not during a medical emergency..." We're hooking up tonight.
Points for getting a hot hook up after getting a shard of glass in your thigh. Almost makes it worth it.
World Cup Drinking Game: Take a shot every time they call a foul for something we don't understand. Gotta risk it to get the biscuit.
You could see the bone sticking out of his shin and he insisted he was "just gunna walk it off"
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
Let's go buy marshmallows and play chubby bunny until we feel alive again
One day no one will want to send me dick pics so by all means keep 'em coming
Randomize
