Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
I woke up naked by my window. blinds open. smiley face drawn on my window.
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
We can smell you smoking weed from downstairs and your little brother is asking why the upstairs smells like gasoline. Please smoke in the basement. XOXO dad.
you just started pointing at the light and whispering "star wars"
Managed to convince my mom that I had been home for 3 hours sleeping on the couch downstairs and this t-shirt was your dads. I am SUCH a fucking boss.
We just leapfrogged all the way to the bar.
Can we just ponder our lives for a second.
No I think my brain may implode in a puff of cocaine and sparkles.
Her eyebrows were plucked so thin that she had to have gonorrhea. Clean girls just don't pluck that way
My black heart of coal cannot compete with your boiling crock pot of teddy bears, rainbows, 90s music, and the good candy you get from rich people on Halloween.
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
He literally lured me in the house with his cat then we ended up fucking on the living room couch while the cat just sat there and watched
I hope every time you eat hashbrowns you think about me, the awesome sex we had and how great we could have been.
We're like a married couple, but we only have sex on college holidays and other people's birthdays.
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