hey soul. what's that? you, dignity and pride are left for the night? coulda told me that before i vomited all over my mother.
I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
you took a scissor and started screaming "I WANNA KNOW WHAT ITS LIKE TO BE BALD"
just heard someone say they saw a guy puke while riding a bike across campus without stopping
my mothers day present is going to be not puking at the table during brunch
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
Don't blame the cocaine for your eating disorder.
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
it's just one of those nights where i don't care if anyone sees my vagina
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
Sorry about coming to the pool in only a thong. I thought you said it was closed. Not that you were teaching a group of kids how to swim.
I yelled at the cab driver to slow down because my unborn children live here, and pointed to my uterus. I think my message was lost in translation though because he immediately offered me his card...
How... how did you get Adam Lambert's shoes? Does he know you have them? DID YOU STEAL ADAM LAMBERT'S SHOES?! Oh my God I am so turned on right now.
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