pedialite and red bull = repair kit
thanks for not screaming that I'm pregnant when that guy was giving me his number.
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
thats the sluttiest christmas spirit ever.
We didn't have a blender for the margaritas, so she tried to use the garbage disposal and wasted half a handle of my grandpa's good tequila.
Apparently I'm the last girl he had sex with. That was over a month ago. If he can go that long without sex then he's clearly not the guy for me
For thanksgving we are only drinking wild turkey for the next 24hrs time to strap your balls back on and maybe a helmet
Ps we bought 8 pellet guns just now
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
I just walked past a guy banging a chick in the back of his car.
So you drank bourbon with cough syrup?
I still had a cough. It only makes sense
Yeah! Don't let me leave the house without marijuana and a juicer.
You brought string cheese to the strip club
Why did I wake up with BYOB sharpied on my stomach
I just hooked up with the German exchange student who doesn't speak English. And you said I have no talent.
I'm literally watching a webcam of the Vegas strip right now and it is making me sad.
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