I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
He about cried when I ordered pizza online. He said it was a miracle.
I have a new drinking limit. I'll stop when I know I'm going to untag the picture that was just taken of me.
I just speedwalked down the broken metro escalator while high. Basically all my worst fears combined
I hate the hobo that sits outside our building
Joe or Chris?
do i even wanna kno y u kno their names?
well i came home drunk one night and Chris offered me a beer as i was coming in, it was kinda weird but i wasn't goin to deny a free beer. you're proolly talkin about Joe though, he's the one with the fucked up eye.
I woke up to the sound of a beer can being opened. I love him already
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
Next time we're there I want drunk pics of us trying to ride the stone lions downtown. Don't even attempt to fight me on this.
My mom and dad are smoking a joint while lecturing me on what to bring and how to act in Europe. I'll finish this glass of wine and head over.
My drunken abilities have only improved since college....I can navigate the streets of chicago like no ones business, do push-ups to hail a taxi and instantly become an mma fighter after 3 shots of hennessy
I think I threw my underwear away at What-A-Burger last night.
Seriously, I am going to crawl in a hole, sew my vagina shut, and spit acid on any man that comes near me.
Eating an avocado like an apple while doing shots of fireball and watching finding nemo. I need to get my shit together.
Where are you guys?
Drunk
Talk all the shit you want but I slept in a oversized monster truck tire last night.
Randomize
