I can't make any promises. I've tried my best to stay celibate. But if a guys on top of me, Im gonna tell him to stick it in.
Why did you take off so early
No more beer. And also. Threesome. Maybe. Ill let you know.
Houston, we have a problem
where are u?
Houston. That's the problem. I don't know how I got here.
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
Your ass just called me, someone was yelling "awful waffle" and also, " I don't know who's hands are who's anymore"
you were passed out snoring, face down with all your clothes still on and 20 minutes later you sat up and said "FUCK YES" and then passed out again.
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
Its official. 'Jingle Bell Rock' gives me a boner. Thank you Lindsay Lohan & Rachel McAdams.
Oh my god. My pre-date bowl for nerves tuned into "I'm too high for this date" he kept talking about trucks and I couldn't stop making racial slurs.
I thought I was smashed last night but the girl trying to pee in the fridge had me beat. True story.
I'm gonna make some noodles and go to bed. Hopefully I don't fall into the stove or something.
Let's buy some Wrangler jeans and be real live men.
He kept asking for nudes so I sent him a picture another guys dick. He called me ruthless.
I just fucked her in the corner of an ally while holding a large pizza waiting on a pledge for a ride.
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
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