There are thorn wounds on my balls, don't ever question my dedication to party again
New favorite sorority...they made me pancakes in the morning and welcomed back the walk of shame girls with a round of applause
I have taken lazynest to a new level. I took a picture of the notes on the board instead of writing them. I win.
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
I really couldn't tell if she was disgusted with the fact that I yacked on her shoes, or if she was about to do the same to me.
If I'm gonna go to jail I'm gonna be wearing a poncho
Why is the word 'best' written on my chest?!!
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
I don't know if I should be scared or excited that I can officially drink vodka on the rocks like it's 7up.
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
Ok. So let me get this straight. She treats her vagina like a clown car, yet judges me for just making out with the guy that bought all of us shots?
Dude, half of south Mississippi has seen my taint. I'm not worried.
I almost had sex at the fire station last night and I need you to acknowledge all the awesomeness that is in that sentence.
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
its liver damage thursday
Randomize
