There's a show on bravo about fat people dancing. FAT PEOPLE. DANCING.
This is god's gift to the unemployed.
i need gas-x and some way to take back every single thing i did last night.
You asked him to stand still, you put your leg on his shoulder, started dry humping the air
literally hosing herself off in my back yard with the hose. i offered her the shower but she refused. that drunk.
apparently i walked around all last night forcing people to beer bong whatever drink was in their hand. so far this morning ive had three people refer to me as beer bong man
We dropped so many bottles they would only give us plastic cups. We actually drank ourselves back to preschool.
We went the strip club and out of no where the waitress brings him over a quesadilla and a jäger bomb and says your usual!! He swore he had never been there before
He's so vague sometimes. Like dude, we've been friends for 3 years. I don't need you to be vague, I need you to be inside of my vagina.
I need to just embrace dildos and cats and call it a life.
I'm really proud of my unchallenged ability to convert boob guys into ass men
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
Yeah, so if you ever try to steal it, just know my tongue's been on it in several occasions. All over it.
Yeah. I hurt his pride. But he's not over it. And by it I mean me.
Literally just stood behind a guy in line at Walmart get his card declined when he attempted to purchase condoms. That's rock bottom.
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