..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
The only thing that would make my night better is if William Shatner came and read me a bedtime story.
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Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
Fat lady wearing Shape Up's. I would feel bad making crude comments, but she has to know it's coming.
Look, as a friend I'm asking to see a picture of his tiny dick
He's socially awkward. He has a big dick. We've had this talk before, they're socially awkward because they don't leave the house they just sit home and play with it.
Absinthe night with my dad again, I could get used to this being home thing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He motorboated me, gave me a business card that said congratulations on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
Trust me. Drunk Scrabble is not a good idea. Arguments over the legitimacy of the word "Pickle" break out, things are said, friendships are ruined. It's ugly.
Whoever decided to put a Denny's that close to the strip club is a genius.
You can't just say "I scored us a potential threesome" and then not text me back.
I seriously feel like I just crawled out from under a shit covered rock. I'm NEVER drinking like that again...well, not for alteast a solid 3 hours.
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