So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
I asked my mom, she said yes...but you have to shower with grandpa.
Great. There's a birthday party at work today. Now I can stand around and feel uncomfortable for an hour.
I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
Classy. Drunk on alcoholic "energy drink" at work before 8 am on a Tuesday. Between that and hanging out in bars with no pants on, your life is beginning to sound like a Bukowski novel.
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
He brought Stephanie home from the black light party. Apparently he has night vision beer goggles
Some dude just came up to me and stroked my beard, smiled and left. Shave?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
I found someone's tooth on the stairs when I was vacuuming, and my sister found a catheter in the men's bathroom... this cleaning job is dangerous
Based on your 5AM twitter activity I gather you found MORE FREE COKE??
I mean, with your nipple problem im surprised. #hangacoatonem
Honestly, this is a first for me. I've always prided myself on my ability to pretend to get along with others.
Is it bad that whip cream tastes like sex to me?
Randomize