Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
So I just used shazaam to figure out a pairs figure skating song. I don't think I could get any gayer.
no sex. but he left me weed, so almost as good.
Sorry I had passed out by this time I think, with the chicken fingers ON my face in my bed, with all the lights on, and ketchup all over.
He's a navy seal. He can stick it anywhere he wants.
I just called him "young grasshopper" in a conversation. THIS is why I don't get numbers when I'm sober
The chips are stabbing my teeth, and I can feel the muscle under my mouth contracting.
I have a friend that keeps saying he wants to go bear hunting. Thought I would say just walk down church street at night. What intersection is it?
Why the fuck is he under my phone as Papi Chulo?
He compared my vagina to his favorite T-shirt. I don't know if I should take that as a compliment or not..
So none of you told me my tits were popping out of my shirt for three hours?
We told you. Repeatedly. You said you made it look good.
I decided to have a date tonight. Back on horse I go. Or aiming to be on a horse cock one day. You know. However that metaphor goes.
Masturbating to death wouldn't be a terrible way to go. If you die tonight, I'll know how it went down. Promise not to tell your family.
Car sex in a public place. Boo ya.
Randomize
