why the fuck does my google maps say i'm in punjab?!?!? u think it has to do with like...outsourcing?
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
Changed it back. Somehow I didn't think my profile pic should be me shirtless on ecstasy, ya know?
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
doing shots of $6 a bottle whiskey and chasing it with milk. my own personal way of saying fuck life.
I look like one classy bitch running in heels through my backyard while carrying a small dog and a large bottle of booze. How am I still single?
Seems like you've kicked summer 2012 off well.
You can fuck me but I'm keeping my parka on.
he sent me the greatest dick pic I've ever received.
he actually took the time to cut a fingertip off of a glove then put it on his dick like a beanie. he called it hipster dick.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wish there was an emoji for sad lady boners
That's brilliant but could get us arrested. Give me shots until I shout LET'S DO THIS
you tried to fight the cop who was busting the party, you said you had a constitutional right to do a keg stand...
A guy I don't even know just ate me out on a washing machine at a random persons afterparty. I came as it was going through spin cycle.Just kept thinking "who does laundry during a party?"
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
When the paramedic asked Logan how he fell he explained that he was trying to lick his eyeball, missed and tripped over his own tongue.
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