Dude love is like an itch. You fuckin scratch it, then it itches more, then you scratch it and it itches more, and before you know it, there is semen everywhere.
you are insane
Dude you called me last night to let me listen to you piss in a cup and drink it. Just making sure you survived
I'm like a wolly mammoth down there. what do I tell him?
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
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Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
He just stared me dead in the eye as he continued to beat off. Then said "you were going to catch me sooner or later".
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
You asked me to text you at 11 and remind you that he's 33. It's 11:20. He's 33.
you're too late. he has eggnog and whiskey and all seven seasons of buffy. I shan't be coming home tonight
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
dude, im taking a shit and i just realized it's his MOM in the shower not him...oh fuck
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
Watching Colbert Report and porn at the same time.
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