glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
Blackberries need to come with a feature that disables texting to certain numbers after 2am based on content. liek disabling texting to 'dad' containng the words 'lets try to find more blow.'
I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
Sucks about the cops last night
to be honest when I first looked up I wanted to know who was coming from a costume party..
My TA just came over to give us drugs. Now he's drinking grey goose with my roommate and explaining his thesis to her. This is too much.
Third base with a 7ft basketball player last night. Fingers like a champ. I call him Edward Penishands.
She was two things I dont understand: tall and Christian
well. can officially check "get caught having sex on the front porch by the neighbors" off the bucket list.
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
FUCK the WHO, FUCK cancer, I'm gonna eat fucking bacon.
But did u die
I found an onion in my purse
three of my fingers are bleeding and the only thing on my phone rn is a google search of 'Allison Janney'
what do u think we would be doing right now if we were together
Urinating on unicorns
Sorry I totally pulled a home invasion on you last night
That was super inconsiderate of me
Randomize
