we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
She went to the bathroom before i broke up with her so i changed all 2500 of her songs on her computer to "I'm a cheating whore"
It was 5 a.m. and we found him making margaritas with nyquil...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
Wine floats aren't as good of an idea as they seem
Yes. Yes. Double yes. I'll bring the tits. You bring the frosting.
Thou shall not celebrate other people's birthdays as if they were thy own
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was in the library and saw 2 dudes hackysacking in a study room with 3 girls working. I asked if I could join; as soon as I closed the door the chicks offered me tequila shots. study session w/everyone cancelled, I'm busy.
I'm washing down the sadness with shots of vodka.
You tried crawling through the apartment window instead of going through the wide open door next to it
One less thong to worry about.
One less *thing! But probably that too.
She told us she had powers and that eating tree bark cures the shits.
I'm making a sandwich topless right now. Remind me again why I don't have a boyfriend?
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