I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
I'm drive I can fine osifer
Houston, we have a problem
where are u?
Houston. That's the problem. I don't know how I got here.
He woke up screaming about pickles. I think it's gonna be a good day.
I woke up to her staring at me in a corner moaning over and over again about how good the pie crust tasted
Upperdeckered the toilet. Took sombrero off, drawing too much heat. Witnessed glassing. In bush, come findme.
the best sex is "duke just lost" sex.
Curled up in the fetal position, trying not to throw up or think about my future, and humming songs from musicals to myself. You?
I'm sorry I didn't respond. I had a shit day. However, I just masturbated to Adele's Rolling In the Deep while crying. It was oddly therapeutic.
I just put on underwear fresh outta the dryer and it's like tiny Angels are giving them warm supportive hugs all over
I just googled, "what type of cured meat does my face taste like", and one of the top results was, "The Definitive Guide to Bacon." I couldn't make this up if I tried.
Something tells me tonight will end with me wearing my pants on my head again.
Is a coke binge Whole30 approved?
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
Randomize
