So drunk its hurt
The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
I was sitting behind this girl in class and she logged out of her facebook, hacked into her boyfriends, and then proceeded to check his inbox. This is why I'm single.
tiger just fucked it up for all of us...she grabbed my phone this morning and started asking questions.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I took her to see 2012 then broke up with her, the movie was a metaphor.
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
I want to put in my resignation as an adult. From now on I will be spending my time drinking beer and skiing.
Made my roommate send me tit pics so I could send them to someone because I didn't want to move.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
I made out with the uber driver for free weed, I thought he deserved it
These last few days with George, grandma, and now Carrie all dying have been pushing me further and further into rum's sweet embrace.
It makes me so happy that my local liquor store has a black lab that is there every day. Really tho - it makes the higher prices excusable.
This bitch goes out driving during the nor'easter to get her ass eaten.. that’s dedication
A cop may or may not have seen my bare ass against the moonlight within the past hour
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