I wish i could sleep and get drunk at the same time...those are my 2 biggest needs right now
I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.
But like now everytime I pee I just think... wow I had sex with him on this toilet.
I woke up to a hotel manager knocking on my car ( window was down) and asking if I was ok
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I cant be sure, but i think ive been drunk in this church before.
I woke up spooning with a broom that someone taped a mustache too..i need to stop starting my nights by drinking "hangover" wine.
I woke up naked except for someone else's socks. Im so proud
I WAS CONCIEVED IN THE BACK OF MY CAR. THATS HOW OLD THIS CAR IS.
...how and why.
PARENTS ARE MAGIC.
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thirty seconds is a long time in jizz time...
He literally just laid flat on top of me motionless at one point. It felt less like foreplay and more like he was trying to use me as a flotation device. 0/10
I just threw up on the way to class. Legit, on the sidewalk by psych building.
THAT WAS YOU? Psych prof just pointed out the window and said "that kids, is why you don't pregame before class"
Wine through a straw in a subway cup.....classy
I wasn’t trying, but work got a lot easier and more fun once he starred flirting with me and looking at my ass
I was a psycho gf all the time...I'm sorry
I was drunk 90% of the time...tit for tat
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