Did we use protection last night?
Um, no...keep in touch, okay?
so i was eating a special k bar this morning for breakfast and started choking on it so i reached into my bag for water turns out it was liquor.
Played "Which Couple Will Take Me Home Tonight" at the bar last night... I can now cross three-some off my bucket list
It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
you have failed as an in class drinking partner.
You rubbing siracha on a cat with your feet is the opposite of what I want.
I'm just going to eat my milkshake, watch teen wolf, masturbate, and lament my inability to form meaningful relations with men who aren't gay
I sent him a tit pic on accident and he replied with "nice ass"
Well puke fest 2014 just happened
So I woke and tried to get up. Then I realised my foot was stuck in the pocket of the pool table.
yea so the plan to relive our college glory days was great and all but ending up in the er with alcohol poisoning was crossing the line
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
I can’t tell if I have feelings for him or if my vagina does.
It’s like a sexy version of those choose your own adventure books from when we were kids. No matter what you choose, there will be penis!
Randomize
