I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
bar tonight had a doorbell to get in and last night i saw my neighbors fuck on the balcony, she wore a nurse outfit. Missouri isn't so bad...
I swear, if I find out you're lying, I'm going to put your name on one of those herpes watch websites and put the link up on every social networking site in existence.
i just broke my key off in the door of my house because the engine wasnt starting
Dude, I found another chunk missing out of my tooth. Fuck drinking on tuesdays.
she's throwing a head of lettuce everywhere shouting HEADS UP and trying to get us to play catch with her. i'm scared.
This is what happens when you live with someone you met on Grindr
One of the art pieces was basically this chick throwing raw meat at the audience, anyone who got hit (which I did) got a free shot of whiskey. It was worth it.
That's what jaeger bombs out of teacups will do to you.
Him naked in my bed with a bottle of vodka in one hand, a pipe in the other, and a rose in his mouth.
By NOT going to the gym, I'm helping my future. I don't want stripping, prostitution, or porn to be viable money making options.
I was trying to drink every time they said planned parenthood but my body isn't cut out for this.
I'm sitting in the hospital with him while he's still half drunk with a busted leg because he thought he could do parkour off a rock
I ripped ass in on and around her face during a hard 69. I don't think she'll ever call me again.
Randomize