I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
to cover up your slurred speech you tried talking like the creepy old man from family guy
At first I was confused when I woke up with shards of glass and pickle brine in my pants. But then I remembered I hung out with you last night.
My vagina hasn't been this smooth since I was 8. I better get laid tonight.
He said I was the "egg mcmuffin" of blowjobs. I'm flattered.
Just saw pictures of a pregnant teen from my hometown with an American flag wrapped around her naked body posted on FB without irony. These are my roots.
She woke me up with an urgent call telling me she was rolling on Mollie and swimming in the ocean. I mean that's just great. If she drowns, I'll feel responsible.
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
I'm developing all these feelings it's disgusting.
That amount of times your family has seen my boobs is getting ridiculous.
Her four year old daughter walked up to me grabbed my junk and said "this will be in mommy later." Wtf?
He's UNCIRCUMCISED. And it curves. Two things I've never encountered in all my sluttiness and they're both on the hottest guy alive. :(
Randomize
