love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
How does, "Im sorry I was such an intoxicated bitch, I didn't mean anything I said" sound as an apology.
once she started licking the door on the stall, i got out of there and told her bf "this is your problem now" and walked away
I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
You just kept taking about baking cornbread and doing your physics. Even drunk assed random you is a better student than me.
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
Please check on her. She announced that Thursday she'd open herself to any veteran so as to thank them for their service. "my services for your service" and left the bar with three numbers.
I am currently watching him baptize himself in a baby pool with a handle of belvedere while wearing a coral dress.
I want to have sex with him.
Ps this homeless dude just came in hotel bar w a sword sticking out his jumpsuit trying to buy a drink w a 3rd party check
I clipped one of my extensions in his hair to give him a rat tail. What is my life?
PA to anyone at the party last night and wondering where your pants are: they are in my backyard.
I think we need to stage an Intervention. Her Instagram is a call for help.
I woke up in bed spooning a vacuum cleaner
Dude, I got drunk and sexted his little sister by accident
What you have to understand is that our lives aren't a disappointment so much as they crashed and burned with lethal doses of radiation and dog shit.
Randomize
