hey soul. what's that? you, dignity and pride are left for the night? coulda told me that before i vomited all over my mother.
the only difference between me and a prostitute was that i complained a lot more.
I'm fucking him on the second date. I don't give a fuck what Patti Stanger says.
I got a chicken sandwich and a frosty out of her. Better then having sex
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is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
Woke up in a closet. I'm not drinking till summer.
you fucking puked into the top of the beer bong while i was chugging from it. when i realized i was chugging your vomit, i vomitted on the floor. she kicked us both out.
So let me get this straight. You would sleep with an uncircumcised guy whose name you didn't know, but you won't try the new shrimp taco from taco bell?
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
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I vaguely remember taking a shit behind the shed before I started puking over the fence. No more Xanax.
Just walked by the neighbors and they are definitely butt naked sitting on a bed, watching Netflix, baked out of their minds, with the blinds open.
Welcome to Bellingham.
I don't think my professor is going to remember the Halloween party... or the fact that he made out with a priest.
Like I'm not tryna become president or marry a doctor or some shit here, like one level above garbage is all I'm asking for
I haven't heard from him yet. He's either still asleep (which is entirely plausible..... There wasn't much sleeping happening last night) or he's robbing me blind. But I have renters insurance, so either way, I'm ok with it.
Fuck you. All I remember from last night is telling random people that I'm in a "judgement free zone" then I threw up
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