She went from zero to smokin in five shots
thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
It was kinda bitchy last night when i brought up my pregnancy scare and you said "shotty playing with it"
Having sex with her was like reading the Wall Street Journal.
He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
Sorry you called when I was puking in a cheetos bag
Just walked out of my apartment and came face to face with a shirtless dude playing with his balls and trying to tie his shoes.
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
I was living a snoop dogg song I fucked her on the floor so I wouldn't mess up my bed
Dude I'm at a Marijuana dispensary party. They are giving away BAGS of edibles
How do you keep ending up in these situations?
My dad is their accountant
He gave me the "find somebody who wants to date you for who you are" speech while I walked around the house asking people for pants.
Yeah I mean I think I need to stop living off of snacks and alcohol
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