So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
I wish they made helmets for livers.
so i just drove past a racoon and a kid on a long board... god i love 4am white castle runs
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
On a scale of 1 to "bad descision", where does stealing my racist neighbors dog and giving him my roomates dildo for a chew toy rate?
I just saw a fat girl roll down the steps taking out three people with her, thought you should know.....
Is it a bad thing that I'm trimming my nose hairs in anticipation for the 8ball to be delivered?
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
Nice. The Governor's son bruised my vagina.
That's going to be the title of my memoir.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She leaned in close to me, made eye contact, and seriously whispered "I will eat your soul with bacon bits." I want whatever drug she was on.
I'm sure if Robin Williams was still with us he would want you to see boobs.
I just used my sisters cheerleading plaque and a children's book to crush up painkillers to snort. Happy Friday
Listen, you eat the donut. I eat you out. Everybody wins.
I got home and he was wearing a suit. He said he reason was because it was shirt and tie Saturday and that he won't change until midnight. He then proceeded to answer the door in a British accent.
I saw some guy masturbating in the Burger King parking lot and I’m just fucking done
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