Just got done shaving my balls. You were right.
his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
I am more sore today than I was after my car wreck. Take it as a compliment that you bang harder than a semi-truck.
As soon as the judge read that I rear ended the car from getting roadhead he chuckled. You know he's been there before.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he said the way to his heart was through his stomach, i told him if he wanted to eat my food he had to eat my kitty
smooth operator
You never did explain why you were in wal-mart with a wok full of popcorn.
My gynecologist got a full view of the obviously bite marked shaped bruises on my thighs. I just kept talking about work and hoped she wouldn't judge me.
Have you ever just like not slept in so long that everything looks like a lava lamp?
Duuuuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fruuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fuuuck
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
PENIS EMOJIS WOULD MAKE MY LIFE SO MUCH EASIER GAH WHY DOES THE WORLD HATE ME
Yes dating, but it seems easier to just live in a perpetual state of Netflix, internet porn, and cheese.
Eat your greens and take your tequila shots
No dude shes like 5 feet tall and maybe 100 pounds... Normally i wouldnt be scared but someone gave her a bat. Thats why im in the bathroom
I’m sorry, some of us common-folk don’t have access to steady dick
I need to leave my mind and my stupid vagina are having fight over who's right
Randomize