I can't. He's too cute and my tongue is too long.
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
Just got a event reminder on my phone to never party with you again.
I called for backup and had two guys carry him to the shower. The bigger guy offered to wash his hair.
I hope we all get so wasted that we ride the cows again
PA to anyone at the party last night and wondering where your pants are: they are in my backyard.
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
It was just a Craigslist hook up but she wore sweats. Where are the girls with class?
When dressing for a 3way, how do I convey to the other chick I care enough to look pretty but not so much that it's a huge deal?
i want george washington to fuck me as hard as he can holy shit
I'm going to have to go for it. It's like Mt. Everest. It's large and unpredictable but I live for adventure and it's worth never coming back from. Mt. BigDick.
Random question, what's John-that-we-had-a-threesome-with's phone number? Don't necessarily need the full number, maybe just area code? Think I drunkenly ran into him last night and now I have texts from a John.
You should've seen the look on the guys face when I demanded pho and a beer the second they opened. Obviously he doesn't understand hangovers
I believe the only reason I am slightly functional right now is the leftover drugs in my nose that I keep sniffing
I am real keen for none of this to be taken out of context so let’s just shut it down right now
Randomize
