I heard some girl say 'yeah he mustve been so drunk he kept mumbling and repeating himself'
And I thought
Fuck I do that shit every weekend
you really are a gigantic fucking slut.
sidenote: just remembered sarcasm does not translate through text
it's probably a bad thing that i wasn't even offended, huh?
I need to buy a mesh tank top to fit in in Florida. Where do they even sell that shit?
I looked her in the eye and told her I was 'balls deep' in love with her...She said that wasn't saying much. Time to drink away the sadness...
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
Hey. Whatever time u wake up let me know Ur alive. I need my vegas partner... I don't think they let u take corpses on a plane.
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
Besides. I don't even really like sex because it feels great. I like it because for thirty minutes I own that guys ass.
Finally smoked with my brothers, I feel like I just won gold at the Best Older Brother Ever Olympics
Apparently 24 hr fitness frowns upon the ingestion of psychedelics on its premises, don't see that in the sign up contract.
We have GOT to stop getting stoned and going out for expensive dinners.
Chasing down vodka with apple juice and crying. Alone.
You stumbled into the hotel room escorted by security and then went into the bathroom sat by the toilet, threw up for hours while slamming your head on the wall and whimpering "why" over and over.. I went to bed
I'm sorry about the fire. I was too fucked up to do science, apparently.
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
Randomize
