Texts From Last Night

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  (941): View more from Florida

  Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?

  (1-941): View more from Florida

  Wow! You need to get laid.

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  (941): Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits? (1-941): Wow! You need to get laid. http://tfl.nu/yl4s
  Replies (47) Good night (837) Bad night (5974)
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  (908): View more from New Jersey

  there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.

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  (908): there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo. http://tfl.nu/6eag
  Replies (37) Good night (4614) Bad night (1044)
• Favorite

  (973): View more from New Jersey

  we got so high we spray painted his girlfriend's UGG boots. she's CRYING. it's hysterical.

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  (973): we got so high we spray painted his girlfriend's UGG boots. she's CRYING. it's hysterical. http://tfl.nu/h352
  Replies (131) Good night (14653) Bad night (3210)
• Favorite

  (502): View more from Kentucky

  she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point

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  (502): she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point http://tfl.nu/71ih
  Replies (20) Good night (879) Bad night (3117)
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  (619): View more from California

  He asked what my name was on facebook chat. IT SAYS RIGHT THERE. i will never be drunk enough for this guy.

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  (619): He asked what my name was on facebook chat. IT SAYS RIGHT THERE. i will never be drunk enough for this guy. http://tfl.nu/8ucs
  Replies (14) Good night (1241) Bad night (5303)
• Favorite

  (404): View more from Georgia

  My dinner was lean cuisine and tequila. Aaaaaand I need a boyfriend.

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  (404): My dinner was lean cuisine and tequila. Aaaaaand I need a boyfriend. http://tfl.nu/ev36
  Replies (9) Good night (1516) Bad night (3623)
• Favorite

  (480): View more from Arizona

  I think this baby is eyeing my beer

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  (480): I think this baby is eyeing my beer http://tfl.nu/6ms6
  Replies (13) Good night (5178) Bad night (1331)
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  (336): View more from North Carolina

  Its only tuesday and I need a dd home from work. This is getting too easy.

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  (336): Its only tuesday and I need a dd home from work. This is getting too easy. http://tfl.nu/6oi3
  Replies (3) Good night (2895) Bad night (1088)
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  (336): View more from North Carolina

  just got hammed at grandma and grampas 30th aniversary bash .. from the looks i was getting im guessing i wont be seeing an inheritance ...

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  (336): just got hammed at grandma and grampas 30th aniversary bash .. from the looks i was getting im guessing i wont be seeing an inheritance ... http://tfl.nu/0ptt
  Replies (18) Good night (1025) Bad night (2758)
• Favorite

  (907): View more from Alaska

  I left two hundred in singles in your car sorry about the mess

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  (907): I left two hundred in singles in your car sorry about the mess http://tfl.nu/1h29
  Replies (25) Good night (3867) Bad night (1150)
• Favorite

  (306): View more from Saskatchewan

  Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.

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  (306): Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me. http://tfl.nu/vlc7
  Replies (2) Good night (2291) Bad night (792)
• Favorite

  (518): View more from New York

  It's like being the highest you've ever been, then doing about 20 shots, and chasing them with lines of coke. All while laying on the surface of the sun.

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  (518): It's like being the highest you've ever been, then doing about 20 shots, and chasing them with lines of coke. All while laying on the surface of the sun. http://tfl.nu/n6c2
  Replies (21) Good night (2264) Bad night (1039)
• Favorite

  (519): View more from Ontario

  Sometimes I think I have so much sex with you to be sure you're actually straight.

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  (519): Sometimes I think I have so much sex with you to be sure you're actually straight. http://tfl.nu/qnvl
  Replies (6) Good night (1657) Bad night (762)
• Favorite

  (919): View more from North Carolina

  These pissing matches have to stop. They led to last night's scotch through the nose shots. I'll never smell again.

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  (919): These pissing matches have to stop. They led to last night's scotch through the nose shots. I'll never smell again. http://tfl.nu/lco3
  Replies (3) Good night (493) Bad night (997)
• Favorite

  (501): View more from Arkansas

  I remember halftime. Then I woke up in Spain. I need a drink in order to process this.

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  (501): I remember halftime. Then I woke up in Spain. I need a drink in order to process this. http://tfl.nu/a4t5
  Replies (8) Good night (1452) Bad night (533)

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