Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(770): View more from Georgia

I have to get up uber early tomorrow. Which is why I started drinking early today

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(770): I have to get up uber early tomorrow. Which is why I started drinking early today http://tfl.nu/7gup

Replies (6) Good night (1089) Bad night (431)
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(479): View more from Arkansas

Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she can't stop having the shits.

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(479): Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she can't stop having the shits. http://tfl.nu/uo57

Replies (13) Good night (555) Bad night (3023)
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(760): View more from California

Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that

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(760): Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that http://tfl.nu/izum

Replies (75) Good night (968) Bad night (5772)
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(405): View more from Oklahoma

I just asked my hair stylist how many percocets she'd do my hair for.

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(405): I just asked my hair stylist how many percocets she'd do my hair for. http://tfl.nu/jd67

Replies (14) Good night (3603) Bad night (1141)
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(308): View more from Nebraska

and then he said he has been waiting since high school to touch my boobs

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(308): and then he said he has been waiting since high school to touch my boobs http://tfl.nu/sqwd

Replies (32) Good night (9979) Bad night (1751)
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(908): View more from New Jersey

I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.

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(908): I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool. http://tfl.nu/5y98

Replies (13) Good night (2004) Bad night (3813)
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(907): View more from Alaska

the pub in dfw airport has a countdown timer to st. pattys day, to the second, i like texas

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(907): the pub in dfw airport has a countdown timer to st. pattys day, to the second, i like texas http://tfl.nu/bksv

Replies (42) Good night (4661) Bad night (899)
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(404): View more from Georgia

My dinner was lean cuisine and tequila. Aaaaaand I need a boyfriend.

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(404): My dinner was lean cuisine and tequila. Aaaaaand I need a boyfriend. http://tfl.nu/ev36

Replies (9) Good night (1362) Bad night (3465)
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(763): View more from Minnesota

Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.

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(763): Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage. http://tfl.nu/62w3

Replies (5) Good night (865) Bad night (1401)
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(619): View more from California

Ya these assholes wanted to like sit around and eat cupcakes and watch the notebook. I was like fuck you, I want to go make some people uncomfortable in public.

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(619): Ya these assholes wanted to like sit around and eat cupcakes and watch the notebook. I was like fuck you, I want to go make some people uncomfortable in public. http://tfl.nu/k68k

Replies (9) Good night (2705) Bad night (490)
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(310): View more from California

My dad just asked Siri to "help me find my daughters dignity."

(323): View more from California

If you were my daughter, I'd do the same thing.

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(310): My dad just asked Siri to "help me find my daughters dignity." (323): If you were my daughter, I'd do the same thing. http://tfl.nu/54s4

Replies (8) Good night (2802) Bad night (676)
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(519): View more from Ontario

i want to live in a society where a 20 year old can wear pigtails and not get them called handlebars, because i look fucking adorable in them.

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(519): i want to live in a society where a 20 year old can wear pigtails and not get them called handlebars, because i look fucking adorable in them. http://tfl.nu/zpwg

Replies (9) Good night (1078) Bad night (310)
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(613): View more from Ontario

Yeah that doesn't involve enough booze, count me out

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(613): Yeah that doesn't involve enough booze, count me out http://tfl.nu/hcl3

Replies (0) Good night (511) Bad night (169)
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(858): View more from California

The compounded multi day delayed hangover hit me hard today, with a vengeance normally reserved for large objects that go in my ass. I don't feel good.

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(858): The compounded multi day delayed hangover hit me hard today, with a vengeance normally reserved for large objects that go in my ass. I don't feel good. http://tfl.nu/j93v

Replies (3) Good night (246) Bad night (487)
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(678): View more from Georgia

You know what I realized today? That my biggest regret of freshman year was ditching you and that foam party to have a one night stand with a skinny jean wearing vocal major.

(404): View more from Georgia

I am concerned for your priorities but also really flattered. Flattery wins

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(678): You know what I realized today? That my biggest regret of freshman year was ditching you and that foam party to have a one night stand with a skinny jean wearing vocal major. (404): I am concerned for your priorities but also really flattered. Flattery wins http://tfl.nu/kskd

Replies (2) Good night (473) Bad night (135)

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