they need to just BURY HIM!
Any time you start making pro wrestling references before 10 PM I know that I'm breaking up a fight between you and some muscled up frat boy you call Hogan.
My boobs are too big for things to be going this downhill in my life.
I am in the hospital with a broken wrist because a guy told me that if I punched him it "wouldn't hurt." it hurt. me. Thank you 11 jello shots.
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
I picked her up for our first date on a fucking horse. Of course I got a BJ.
You went from loaded cattleman, to football player, to better football player, to art major from Missouri. Your future was looking so good for a while.
in my defence, i did try to get you to put your shirt back on, then you screamed at me to stop telling you what to do
I feel like the other woman.
You ARE the other woman.
I was only out of town for 1 week. His cell records show he texted 63 ex-gfs and hookups while I was gone. And 10 condoms are missing.
I think I'm just gonna be a cat and wear slutty black clothes with some eyeliner on my face and pretend my ears got stolen by a drunk guy
I just pictured ballsacks being shoveled into the furnace of the Titanic.
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
I'm really busy with my period
Randomize
