Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
you dont seem to understand my overwhelming need to watch space jam right now
I made a mac n' cheesicle. Better in my head than in real life. Gonna keep smoking to see if it gets better.
Would it be inappropriate to do lines in front of the cable guy?
thanks for waiting 12 hours to ask if I was in a ditch or not
I sang again at the bar lastnight I don't think alanis morrset knew when she wrote you outta know that the drunk version was going to be go fuck yourself Josh and Chelsea. I love $2 wells.
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
Every time I walk onto campus my Saint Patrick's day scar starts to throb. I'm like a drunken accident prone Harry Potter
I drunkenly called my ex on Skype last night and didn't talk, just smiled real big at him until I fell asleep.
There is not enough soap in the world to make me feel clean after last night. Im gonna need jesus for this one
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
I know it sounds all cute and shit that I wanted him to be with me last night, but it's not cute. I just wanted to fuck.
You kept purposefully giving me wrong directions, laughing, then yelling at me for taking directions from a drunk person.
Of course his biggest mistake was assuming that I ever gave a fuck to begin with.
I think i got beer on your cat.
Randomize
