he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
GOOD NIGHT DREAM OF ALCOHOL SNO CONES
I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.
you're the one asking for my vibrator at 4 in the morning so reconsider your life
You burned the hair off your arms. Again.
It grows back stronger each time.
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
I didn't know White Castle was open when your sober.
masturbating on the freeway is more stressful than it sounds
Hey can you explain why there's a dissected coconut in my purse????
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
You were in the back of the cop car and told the cop to ask me if I got laid. Youre a dedicated wingman.
Randomize
