are you so shy because you have an std?
I wish i could make my toaster dance like they do in the second ghostbusters. But i dont have ectoplasmic goo. Or a toaster.
She told me she was a cowboys fan... I told her it was a waste of a perfect set of tits
two gay guys came in and bought just a kite and a box of wine. Why cant I have saturday nights that awesome
seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally
Just pulled a muscle trying to take a naked pic. I think it's time to start working out again.
Medically speaking as your gynecologist and your girlfriend, that is not a rash.
And we're breaking up
Can you bring home bongs? Like all the bongs. I need bongs
I never thought I would be saying these words but...when did David Spade get hot?
Playing pong against a girl who fucked my ex boyfriend so that's how my nights going
can we not speak foreign languages when I'm on drugs
We're so high we're eating flavored lube.
You're moving up the public shitting ladder
outside on the street drinkin, walked into a random house and asked to pee, some kid hands me a beer and says i have to chug it first
I walked in the kitchen and heard her saying "We could have been so good together" as she caressed an egg with her cheek.
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