At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
Walked home this morning with my contacts in a shot glass.
First class.
hey you sure the big one didn't have a penis she left the seat up
After doing lines off my chest, she said, "do you even know how fast I could suck your cock right now?!!" and her friend said, "yea she totally could".
So squirting runs in the family.
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
ATTENTION ALL CONTESTANTS OF SLUTFEST 2012 ; not only will we be judging on how many penis you have sucked but also girth and length will be calculated. If you are found lying you will be disqualified. Remember your fellow participants will be rendering the same services to probably the same people. So choose wisely and let the games begin!
We have so much sex to catch up on
I should start wearing my Batman shirt more often when I drink. Good things happen. All sorts of shit.
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
You need to somehow incorporate the phrase "these hoes ain't loyal" into your best man speech.
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
When have you ever know me to go too far?
Besides the alcoholism, the HR issues, and getting fired from Best Buy for tackling a display?
Yeah. Besides those.
Randomize
