dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
Somehow I managed to make my Dunkin Donuts uniform look slutty. And I'm not even wearing hoops.
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
I threw up in the bar parking lot and yelled THIS IS MY FUTURE.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
I literally just got propositioned by a sugar daddy.
OUR DREAMS ARE BEING REALIZED. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
The best part of last night was the women's softball game on the TV at the strip club
I broke my arm trying to do a hand stand in my shower to wash the hate out of my asshole.
I thought adderall would sober me up, but it did NOT.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A special kind of bond is formed between two people when they act as a pee shield for one another for drunken pisses in an alleyway
So apparently I initiate sex in my sleep
He just stays over and makes naked pancakes in the morning
If someone tells me they're a paramedic, how inappropriate is it for me to ask what their save to kill ratio is?
I gotta stop fucking the bouncers. We are running out of bars to go to.
I know she’s pissed I fucked her husband, but I didn’t know he was married until after I blew him at Legoland
Randomize