This girl is more easily done than said...
some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
my brother is about to go smoke a joint outside... he's preparing his munchies on the counter beforehand. I admire his responsibility.
he said that he wanted to outsmoke the rain, I don't know what that means but I'm gonna go help him
I just got checked out by a paramedic whilst their sirens were on. I'm doing something right
You better keep a close eye on your uterus tonight cause I am looking good.
I need a hug and tequila
I'm sitting next to a milk crate full of tequila right now
This is why we need to live in the same city again
You don't realize how cold it really is...I poured my bong out the second floor window and icicles hit the ground.
It's ok, I did squats with my bottle of wine before I opened it. That counts as the gym since I won't be getting there haha
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
The drag queen you used to date and the girl you brought over last night are discussing your sex noises in my living room. I'm changing my locks.
He was 6'8" - I shit you not! He sat up in my bed and the ceiling fan got him right in the forehead.
Well hell, he's gotta sleep in the bed he's made. Multiple times. For multiple girls I'm sure.
Randomize
