All I'm saying, is that being compared to a Muppet is not the end of the world.
I pulled my tongue muscle last night. your welcome.
When we were grinding I think your nuva ring fell into my shoe
you were leaning up against the wall pulling your shirt up asking girls to dance on you. your courage to do that is both admirable and frightening.
I seriously think the toilet is the cleanest thing in their house. At least if I have to worry its not about that.
Just watched a girl fall down the stair and be to drunk to get up. The only stair in the bar. It's like watching a turtle on it's back.
You just jumped of the couch and yelled "hidden tiger crouching dragon!" That's the answer to how you broke your finger.
This is not a costume party, I'm just wearing fairy wings.
Of course you are.
When you put my balls in your mouth i just want to buy you expensive gifts...you know what i mean?
My vagina has a mind if its own. Can you imagine if I didnt have you to run her ideas through.
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
The doctor basically called me a dirty dick.
Remember earlier when I was excited about finding that birth control pill in my purse? Definitely acid.
My mom's yelling at me for being a whore and my dad's quizzing me on how to drive in winter weather....I'm home!
My new favorite word is dickbag. I think its relevant here. And I say that with all the love in the world.
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