I just googled "whats above a trillion", thats how busy I am at work.
i just looked up and i was like omg ballsack and then i didnt know what to do
It was literally me in an evening gown and him in a tux with six bottles of Vodka at Jons.
And this was for your brother's Christening?
This shit I'm taking feels like I've eaten every burrito in the world and chased that with an aquarium of hot sauce.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
honestly, i'm just crying in the kitchen naked and eating salsa
Me too like the fact they didn't arrest me wants to send them an edible arrangement
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
We've been fucking like crazy ever since she quit her job..ive been running errands all day to stay out of the house and give my dick a day of rest
I hate my life now
The waitress at the Denny's in usa remembered me from 2 years ago when we went at 4 in the morning plastered, wearing overalls and huge inflatable corona hats on our heads
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have to stop at Sheetz to put my bra back on before I meet you hold on
I farted in the parking garage and it echoed.
So, I almost went hone with a French guy and a drag queen. Together. Then I became sober enough to realize, that's not my style.
i'm bringing homemade birthday cake and homegrown weed. how awesome is this text?
I basically spent the entire weekend in bed with that red head.Every time I tried to leave she got me too horny to think straight. I was kidnapped by vagina
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
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