Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
When they saw it was the 7th inning of the baseball game one took off running for the beer stand while his friend is yelling "BUY THE KEG"!
Honestly, I don't care if the only reason she gave me her beer was because she was bisexual and wanted to touch my vagina. Beer is beer.
We're trying to leave but amy's hitting on the guy who mans the nacho cart
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
oh dear god, that would be like watching to female walruses mate. We need to stop going to that lesbian bar...
Hey you remember last Super Bowl when I sent you a pic of my testicles? Memories...
Back of his car in the Starbucks parking lot WITH HIS APRON STILL ON. Check and Mate.
Holy shit. You won barista bingo AND the Triple Crown in one day.
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
I have accepted that I am a sexual predator. What I can't accept is the lack of sexual men for me to seduce in this town.
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
Might call you tomorrow on a drunken hate filled rant, or just a normal hate filled rant, either way be ready.
Sorry I didn't call this morning. Ended up with a decorated war veteran last night who besides finding the enemy, KNEW where the fuck my G spot was. He gets a medal in my book!
He went down on me and then made me breakfast in bed. He's a man you can bring home to mom.
My theory is if i keep drinking, evolution will kick in and I will grow a bigger, faster, and more improved liver by January.
Randomize
